Voting

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Panic

There are three moments in my life (in recent memory) when I have felt complete and utter panic--my brain shuts down (along with all practical thought) and my emotions take lead--usually run by fear (not always the best for problem solving).

The other night we went out to dinner and then to Sam's Club. The place was super crowded and I was a little tired and not feeling too well, so it was all I could do to walk that huge place with my wild children running all over. Matt and I split up, he took the kids because he always seems to have more energy than I do (especially these days), and I stood in the biggest line ever to check out.

I guess the kids decided they wanted to come back to me--so Matt sent them my way. Ray found her way back, but somehow Jackson made a wrong turn and got lost in the huge crowd of people. When Matt came back a couple of minutes later, without Jackson, that is when panic set in. Matt took off while I waited with Reagan (who happened to be screaming, of course) and I watched him as he moved around through a few aisles, then went to check the bathroom, and still didn't have him. That is when I almost started crying!

I picked up Ray and took off running towards the back of the store--it was a funny sight--this panicked, pregnant woman with a screaming kid on her hip, yelling for Jackson (I am embarrassed to even think about it now). My mind started flashing visions of Jackson being kidnapped and me never seeing him again (why does logic always fail me when I most need it??)--and Matt still hadn't found Jackson. I went to get some help from some of the employees and instead of saying "My son is lost, can you help me", I said "I think someone took my son" (my imagination had somehow taken over my mouth) and everyone looked at me like I was crazy (because I was).

To make this super long story end, My level-headed husband located Jackson, who was screaming his head off, and I just went running over to him, hugged him, and cried (with everyone looking at me). Hopefully everyone saw that I was pregnant and that gave me my excuse to act so crazy. Although only a ten minute ordeal, I can't believe that we all came out of it relatively ok (although three of the four of us were crying).

What lesson
should I have learned from this? That I need to learn to keep my cool and not panic so that I can think clearly in these situations. What lesson did I learn from this? To never let Jackson out of my sight again!! Sometimes I don't learn as quickly as I should...

7 comments:

  1. Oh Amber...I can EMPATHIZE with you 100%. This year at the Angels game (I too was pregnant)...same thing...Ned thought I had Ella, I thought he had Ella...all the suddend (only a few feet away) someone is asking whose baby this was and she is screaming her head. It was the worst feeling I have had in my life...and I DID start bawling...I felt SO bad. So dont worry your not alone...

    Lesson to be learned...you are only human. And your pregnant (half a brain is gone for 9 months).

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  2. ...and after...as you can see from my lovely spelling...ha ha ha

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  3. Amber you have every right to act the way you did. I promise I would have done the same thing!! (and probably will...it's inevitable that this will happen to us...)

    Take care!!!
    Love
    ginger

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  4. Oh my gosh I am panicking just reading this. I am so glad you found him safe and sound.

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  5. oh amber! i soo feel for you! so grateful that you found Jackson, and know that you're not the only paniced mom out there just trying to do the best she can! sending a big hug your way!

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  6. Why does that happen? Your brain just starts thinking about the most horrible things!
    I dont know if you were there when I thought I lost Gavin at the park. I thought for sure someone took him. No, he was running around in the skate park.
    Bottom line, kids need low jack.

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  7. That is so scary, Amber!

    I automatically run for the door when I am missing a child- that way no one can escape with my kid! It's happened to all of us!

    I just tagged you, check out my blog for details.

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